Thursday, August 4

test message

is it to test my strength, my disposition or my feelings? Is it to rattle and confuse me once again? Or just a revenge to never ever give me peace?

Incoming text Message:

"Hi how are u? Is it true dat Abby's pregnant?"

My Response:

"Who are you?"

Incoming Message:

"Im jovie, u 4gt m already? Im the x of harold"

and suddenly the light brought clarification to it all.

.... someone tell me what is the right way to feel...don't I ever deserve peace? Haven't I earned it yet? Is it hard to understand that however much I wish for him to be happy with his life that I am left hurting still? Is it hard to grasp that when you really loved another that his happiness is what you seek but the pain remains for his happiness do not include you?

...when would this ever end..........